A Letter to My 16 Year Old Self

I began a writing challenge today (see the new section!). 30 days of writing, every day. I'm pretty excited, but filled with some anxieties as well.  I thought a lot about this letter before I started to write it, afraid of missing something important (because it's a big deal writing to your former self).  I forced myself to stop worrying and pick up the pen.

*A letter to my 16 (going on 17) year old self. I was a junior in high school.

Dear Sara,

Such a good kid, always playing by the rules. How's your first relationship going? It's been over a year since mom and dad got divorced. Look at how strong you've been through the whole thing! I want you to know that crying is not a sign of weakness. It's ok if you don't cry now, because you will eventually- A Lot! I know he doesn't say it much, but he still loves you and always will. Talk to him- your fears, questions, and anger matter.

I wish I could protect you and warn you from all of the things to come. But let me tell you what I've learned:

I know you're close to moving away to college, taking your first steps into adulthood....

On Love- Know the difference between love and lust- it will make all the difference, and I know you will figure it out quick. Love is not about receiving. It's about giving from your own "stash" of love that you have for yourself, and hoping it comes back around (and if it doesn't, well at least you love yourself first). If you always love yourself- truly and deeply- you can love another person. Follow your heart and use your intellect, and stick to your guns. Oh, and please don't sleep with too many people.

On Friendship- The friends you have now won't be the same ones you have in 10 years. Heartbreaking, right? Yea, a little. People come and go and you'll always have memories and good times. Hold onto those, they are worth all the time you spent making them. Even if the friendship fades, don't lose the memories. I know it will be hard, but please try not to let a guy come between you and your BFFs. If you do, just learn from the mistake and try to find a balance. Nurture the friendships you have at any given time in your life. There will be times where you feel friendless and alone – just remember someone else is feeling the same way. Reach out to people! And you always have your little brother, don't ever take him for granted (no matter how much he bugs you, it's just because he loves you).

On Money & Things- You don't need all the stuff you think you do. Trust me, you will spend the better part of your twenties trying to simplify. And when it comes to borrowing money for school, because that's what you're going to have to do, only take enough for tuition! Figure out the rest some other way.

On Career Choices- You are going to be great at whatever you do! Let me save you a few bucks and several years by letting you in on a secret – you want to be a creator and designer, a maker and writer. Don't worry about always feeling like you haven't made the right choice, you're a dreamer and your veins are filled with wanderlust. Be confident in your decisions and give it your all. Fill your time with meaningful doings and thoughts, and never give up.

On Life- Live for you, today! Money, marriage, kids, etc., don't bring happiness (and please don't do the latter two just because everyone else is...). You have to choose to be happy! No matter how dark the days seem, it's not as bad as you think. Despite what everyone tells you, I know you will do life your own way and live and learn. Mom and dad will cringe (hell, you'll probably look back and cringe too), but you will turn out ok. Better than ok.

I have a lot of respect for you dear 16 year old Sara. We've always had our head on pretty straight. I could write to you forever, but always remember:

Love yourself, choose happiness, be creative, and live a simple and honest life. And watch out for those boys :)

I love you to the moon and back,
Your Older Self


If you've never done an exercise like this, you should.